World that we living in...far beyond the simplicity of living where in happiness was to have full plate dinner with family...was to visit friends with kids...was to generously welcome guest & treat them as Krishna in Sudama's house...am talking as if i belong to this world for more then 100years & m tired of this generation & their tantrums:P

Well, yes am very much part of this tech savy generation wherein happiness is flaunted on facebooks, thoughts are floated on twitter, anxiety is to see how many people notice you & your lifestyle. I choose to be away from this, without denying the fact that I want to be part of it. Ha...I know its confusing, so the thing is when you see happy post, you do wonder ok chalo I ll put mine as well & then u enjoy all the likes & comments you get on those post. But then when I sit I do think why is it necessary to flaunt my world (which I often do sometimes intentionally sometimes unintentionally). For instance flaunting my highly intelligent brother  & its high tech toys. Even he doesn't do all this, then why do I, just to ensure that m very much in this race of high standard of living...blah blah... I dont want to do this. It was better when you worked hard & you were distinguished with the marks you achieved rather than being standing out with the brands you use & parties you attend. Its not that am anti brand but pick something you like irrespective its of which brand..local or Prada..who cares. But its true as soon as somebody tries to flaunt, it triggers me to give back not to show off but just to make other person realise stay grounded...u not the only one...but thats so not correct..how about just laughing in ur heart & smiling on ur face...(so much better option to be followed). Let them be happy in it, you have not taken any oath to teach anybody anything, wherein in thess cases its absolutely not required. I think learning for me here is to do what I enjoy doing most irrespective about if others like it or not, if they like it today & make you happy; tomorrow they will dislike it & make you sad. Its better off to stay away from this gimmick & paparazzi. Guess one of the not so controllable factor of extroversion is inviting more & more people in your life but in this bargain unwanted people come in the picture. My gesture is to constantly learn to be a better & mature human being & I will not step back. I know what areas of improvement is & I ll try my best not to showcase or flaunt or prove anyone anything. The ones who matter know you, value you & love you. Thats enough to share your laughs with them, to throw your tantrums on them, fight as if you want to kill them & then hug as if you will die without them:)

Not to forget, its good to smile, help & be kind to everyone but then not to take this magic wands too much so that its turns unnecessary, not required because then theses gestures will be simply mistreated & wasted.

Alright, confession time over & now wish time...so whats my todays wish...so mother fairy & papa daddy here is ma small wish list:))

Its a new beginning for him, bless them with all the happiness & love

I see him improving & growing as a human, make him the best & kind human 

looking forward for small family outing & i mean complete family;) to my paradise land...home sweet home..

Heath for my food luving. my jhagdalu partner, my laughter dose...

Acceptance & peace for my soul friend

Laughter & smile for my office strength

Courage & wisdom to choose right path ( u know for whom:)

Signing off with a thought that I wondered big social parties are fun but they aint for me...wondered that I would enjoy overnight trips & go on another trip but I dont...i hav tech guru in my house but I choose to still be happy while putting flowers in my vase...

Do whatever you want to do man (copyright Salman)

Thank u almighty for being always...

Twilight...

The most beautiful movie i have ever seen that defines love. Abstract thought, fictitious backbone everything woven so beautifully for a second mind thinks that world is true & this one isn't. Absolutely in love with the movie & the not so existing world of love. Wish if I practice I too can gain some power...

Its so tricky to find love or to see love in the ones who are with you. Probably if you take so much of effort to see & feel it you haven't yet found it.

Heart smiles when i see us together but mind doesn't agree to you because of your actions. Never mind till the time heart is beating it ll keep searching. But its beautiful, love is beautiful may be it has shortest life but it makes living worth a while. This period is tricky, the emotions are illusionary, the smile is so pure as if flowers are blooming. Everything is simply so good to feel, you dont want to impure it with reality but just want to stay in the moment & experience its light of purity. SO happy to be in solitude just with the thoughts that complete my dream land. Reality is no where close to it & it hurts but have got just one life. Either I can choose to live in real world & keep sulking or live in this dream world where in every moment is so wonderful.I dont want any 'pinch' me because I dont want to wake up. I am so happy being Cinderella in this world or Barbie or all the best of characters that brought  smile on our face till the time we realised it never exist. I still wish to live with that thought of hope that it does.

With this beautiful wonderland & Beautiful day & beautiful movie I sign off, what else can I ask God for!

Feels Blessed

....

Dreams Come True...

Its only when you with your self, you look at that wall, you look at that fan, you look at that Idol and wonder why your mind is thinking so much. It thinks every possible thing that you may not want to think. But it thinks & thinks & finally you land up in your dreamy world.

Dreams are so beautiful & at times so scary. You land up being Cindrella or you are robbed by supervillan. You visit the most beautiful place & kiss the most handsome person or you are scared till the death by random Ghost....OOO...did i just say ghost...Shhhh...

Dreams are lovely in its own way & then you wake up with a smile on your face because you dreamt of what your heart wants. Ha...its amazing when you work hard towards your dream & finally you live your dream in real. The feeling is divine. You feel close to word 'achievement', you start relating to so called word 'purpose'. Finally you get what you want. The journey wasn't easy but walking the path towards your dream, didnt have words like obstacles, difficulty, roadblocks. They also move but on termination route:D. 

Fulfillment of each little small thing brings a blissful smile on your face. Its amazing, you feel blessed, you-yourself create so called definition-"POSSIBLE".

:)...is the only expression one can relate to. What's next, after fulfilling one dream...here comes beautiful second dream & so on & on. Wow....we dream so much before we go in a land of only dreams & our final sleep. Its difficult to understand life made up of our dreams, demands, needs, desires. But its  fun to feel it, live it & its amazing journey of emotions (scientifically power of hormones triggered by intake of vitamins & protiens & external triggers as well:P). Ha...i do use my science knowledge some where:P

While I write this, the only thought in my mind is CHANGE. We love to do new things, meet new people, pursue new interest & interim miss the word sustain. We constantly change to evolve but is it always essential? 

Waiting for something new which has power to only grow & not die (Is this my new abstract dream):D

While this little blog is over...here are few recipients of my hearty thanks. 

Almighty-you teach me each lesson of life with patience & allow me to repeat my mistake just to tell me you always their with me:).

My little beautiful house who taught me the most wonderful lesson of life - To Cherish. 

That little habitat of my computer which allowed every single organism to experiment. 

Noisy fan - you were better than AC any day

Stairs - You were d most effective treadmill of my life

My corner - Where i dreamt of most beautiful dreams of my life

Balcony - That showed me all sorts of action movies;)

Wooo I miss that house (with allllll good memories):)))

I hope I ll dont have to let you go anytime (crossing fingers)...

Last but not the least...if you reading this...hope you always remember me in your good books...because...I Will....

Signing Off

From 'New' Dedicated Room for my PC-Spacious & Breezy

Hope you treat us well....we are the pampered ones;)

Its for you...Gift of 2012

2012...& not even a single post.....how one gets carried off as soon as they enter happy land....forgot to blog or may b wasn't triggered enough  to scribble...

2012 a year of no resolution....did not wait for clock to strike 12...preferred sleepin....din make any resolution...yet everything went perfect this year....

My all time fav resolution, will join Yoga, this time I dint make and I joined Yoga. My all time sad story"m not loving my job" and now m working in a new role and m happy with it. My not so good birthday & still lot of surprises...not bad...So 2012 you have stored good reasons for me to smile. 

Better reasons. I met him. M still figuring out your importance in my life but yes being with you is my happiest moment. You make me realise what love is, which i dont respect though:P...

My brother has a competition.....someone loves me lil less or equal to him. It seems I have someone who ll die for me or live just to see me happy. You know all my fairy land talks and you can relate to them. You know me as a kid, you know me as a girl, you know me as an angel, you know me as a demon;) but you know it all. Even I know you...as a heart who loves, who cares for all, who wanna see all around smiling but got to tell you you have the best smile in this world.

Your eyes say it all, good-bad; happy-sad.....but they convey ur heart as clearly as pebbles in pure water.

Indeed very good feeling but as always my bestest friend"confusion" is not leaving my mind. For a change m writing word 'confusion' with a smile.

I dont want to think because there is confusion waiting to grab me in its arms. I just want to live, live with you in your arms. Everything around me is perfect when m with you.  It could be for a moment, for a week, for a month or may be forever. But can I want to live in this hallucinating world without any thoughts.

Just want to leave this moment with a smile on your face.......you are truly gods child....may you get best of everything and thank you for all the happiness you gave.....I dont wanna ask anything else from you....I got everything......

Wanna sleep with this thought....who knows if we have same day tomorrow or may be different...

Love you God for embracing me with love so beautifully...

Signing off.......

With smile n only smile.........

Thoughts

Still my mind is thinkin...don know what n don know why.

Why exactly do we come on this earth? what is the purpose of running behind things that will never be ours? Why are we spending so much to look good when this body at the end is not ours? What is the state of happiness when in reality it lasts only for some time? Why are we attached to people when they will never be with us for lifetime?

We all come with our own destiny, karmas but where are the guardians who will guide us to the path. Its so difficult at times to understand what is correct and what is not. No one is their to show you the path, every one is busy in their life. When you try to seek help, you act as annoying character. Would god be kind enough to show us the direction with prominent evidence. I know he has assigned a master for him, I know m guided by spirits who has abundance of knowedge. Just looking out when will they stop this continuous churning mind and get it to a stillness. Stillness of no thoughts, stillness of clarity, stillness of loving, stillness of being kind, stillness of sharing, stillness of giving. I feel m running n just running but its never ending road and I am tired.

Its difficult to explain why m I worried when all I have is reasons to be happy. As i say key to everythings is 'Patience'. Everyone gets what they desire. I ll get my desire path and direction sooner or latter.

Wondering if i shuld post this....nevermind....m sur there are million minds whose state is similar to mine.....I pray at this moment everyone get their path....path towards goodness and love..

Thank you lord for being their always.....

Wish to Fly



Tracing our day to day stuff in words like going on, lets see, dragging it…isn’t that difficult. But some one going behind these words and giving reason for existence of these words is indeed not less then a miracle.

This is exactly what Taran did today. Who else would know you the best but your friends; who have seen you in thick and thin… Not loving your job, having fight at home, are not really example of crisis. Crisis is something else, m sure taran you would be able to catch what m trying to throw. Coming over that crisis and then cribbing is not that bad either. What is more important is keeping the faith in you alive.

Was just talking to taran on decisions that I made, honestly was trying to crib on decisions that I made…regret would be really harsh word…crib is still better. Of late I had started misunderstanding myself or rather had a doubt on myself; what decisions m I making. But thanks to taran she made me realize it’s not me but circumstances around me that trigger me to take step.

One of the most disturbing thought that was going in my mind was why didn’t I prepare for competitive exams and today I got answer for that. It was the pressure that I wanted to share at that point of time. Thinking my step 2 years back really makes me feel good about myself. It would be too early if I loose faith in me and decisions I take. M sure like every rough day this too shall pass. Its not that bad or else I would have left it long back but thing is that my heart is not happy. M not doing something m passionate about…I don’t really want to learn this or rather learning is not good enough to motivate me to understand it. Howsoever you term it. I know this is among the list I don’t want to do again. I ll wait for right time and right opportunity or rather right circumstances that triggers me to take the right decision. I am child of circumstances. Circumstances are one of the major reasons in building my identity. I have not chosen to be this but circumstances have made me like this.

I am happy; they drive best in you. But still for a change I wouldn’t mind leading a life where word ‘circumstances’ doesn’t exist.

I wish I could fly……………………………………..

Signing off from thought land....

God Bless!!

27th July 2011

Zindagi milegi na doobara or zindagi na milegi doobara...m still confused! Liked my majority but i fall in minority. Movie was damn slow. Characters were just floating! What was remarkable, was the stillness captured once you live what you desire to live for. The moments are well short but it truly lacks strong script. Nevertheless the bottom line is"we just have one life". I so very what to go to spain and explore it, the way it was show in movie..CRAP....i dont have money to go to igatpuri and i will live my dream. What is practical is enjoying bike ride in monsoon, eating butta, craving for panipuri and doing crazy things.

Life is indeed funny and out of my reach. When I leave office at 7 and reach home at 9, m not happy. But when when I leave office at 8.20 and reach home at 9, m thrilled...life is funny indeed. Sometimes I wonder m i really philosophical or my mind is fooling my heart to believe so.

Dont feel like writing anything more....thank u 27th july u have behaved like a good day...god bless u....goodnite...siyonara....

Take a break from 'Expectations'

As soon as I stop expecting that is exactly when you start fulfilling my expectations. It was you who taught me to expect and its me who is learning to have patience. 'Right time right place right things'....is perfect.....fits in any situation that you are thinking of...m sure you are smiling now. Jokes apart we have right time for everything, expectations kills that right time. To fullfill our expectations we start expecting small expectations.....we expect soooo much....take a chill pill and give expectations some break. Or may be a real long break. Trust me the happening without expectations either make you happy or you are neutral but no dissapointments. Easy said that done....

Key to expect less.....

1. Expect the most.....you will get dissapointment.....you will become sad n now forget everything n leave it up to GOD - first sign of not expecting from yourself....

Things starts happening because you had lost hope and faith in God is giving you joy....

Little things, little achievements brings lots of happiness....

2. Another mantra of not expecting is.....let go your happiness....

Sooner we start getting little joy we become more eager to live in that joy or increase that joy or sustain it forever......but rule of nature......after every sunday their is monday....after death their is life....after failure their is success....the lifecycle curve has a bent too....bottom line...no matter what the cycle continues....sunrise...sunset...sunrise..day....night...day....enough of example.....point should be clear now....

If you are getting happiness with little things....let go your happiness dont hold it back.....this will prevent sorrow to enter your doors....

You get something be happy come back to neutral.....streching happiness will take it to the peak which has fall....but living in happiness willl give you the true essence of it.....let go your happiness when it wants to take break from you....meanwhile you leave your hope n have faith in GOD....

Cycle Continues..........

Expect less….strive more…..

Be happy...enjoy sorrows…..

Don’t hold present because every future has new present stored….

Don’t run in present to achieve something in future….live in present because future is present….

We always get what we act on….we design our life….its in our hands to make life easy and live with abundance…..its all in the mind………..

Signing Off from lilltle corner where my computer breathes.....

God Bless....

Celebrate Life

It’s never too late to celebrate the glory of life, innocent smile of a child, divinity of night. A stress less laughter of a child, of an elderly person determines the happiness that is missed in the young minds. We waste so many years to realize what we have lost and finally when we wish to rejoice it is too late. Never let this happen when things are out of reach because things go no where, its we who run from present and land up no where..

The fact is past would never come and future doesn’t exist, reality is present which gives the answer of everything.

The other facet of present is death which is totally uncertain to us. Therefore what is certain should be respected and taken care off. Afterall we have got only one life and you never know if it is our last chance to smile and rejoice beauty of life.

Confusion

why r we confused???

this is d reason why we r nt happy,nt satisfy,blank,,,,,,,,

But why r we confused

-options

-lack of self analysis

-lack of proper guidance

-lack of positivity

n many more

Its basically because now we are aware of many options. spectrum has increased n we r not able to analyse wat we r in....bt also d reason is though d spectrum has increased bt mentality hasnt....if u lik painting u wil think tons of time whether u want it as ur profession n dat is where confusion comes in picture...which has gt endless solutions...rather jus gt into d field u lik n don create confusion bt here in picture comes expectations...we dont expect nything 4m us bt 4m d work....if i become a painter wat m i goin to gt...n again comes in picture is confusion...4 dis.. determination is solution n gt in top of dis profession; den cmes society wid all cons of being a painter n narrows d field by saying ‘cooperate rules d world’ n dere is no lif in being a painter....again cmes in picture is confusion....dis time its nt only confusion bt stress, strain n negativity n sadness to.....sadness came in picture because of oders..so best way is 2 gt rid of it is analyse urself n tell urself wat u wan 2 do inorder 2 b happy irrespectiv wat ur work is gonna do 4 u n abt society...dogs cant liv widout barking!!!!!But d fact is we still gt in wat we don lik probably we gt in sumthing dat society likes....who says we hav gt options actually we dont have options............

P.S. an article that i wrote really long time back wherein i was not aware of word doc n hence wrote dis in notepad...now u must realise how old dis article is...

Strange...

Today I created a blog to express myself....was just turning my diary pages to find something to post. Read my know stuff and realised how our thought process evolves. When people say we grow mature with the passing days, the statement sounds stupid...we feel we remain the same forever. But when you introspect your own self, you realise what you believed yesterday may not be your belief today.

Strange is human personality and strange is its mind. Its never stable, never same and never happy. All the while it keeps searching for something that never existed or may be it does...I dont know.

Sometimes I feel what we feel is that the reality....for instance is darkness really beautiful?
In dark neither we can see good nor bad; should we be happy that we are not seeing the ugly or be sad it is depriving us from beautiful sight....

In darkness we get sound sleep but it also gives us nightmares...
It doesnt show us path clearly but the silver line is visible only in its beauty...
It covers the light with its shadow and make moon reflects its divinity...

Darkness indeed is beautiful...it creates silence in air, magnifies the street, calms you down n bring stillness in one being...

Life is indeed strange with strange perceptions and delusions....we make it how we perceive it….we do evolve because the only thing that is constant is change….

Thoughts

Thoughts are pearls which are scattered without words,
Words are thread which put them together in the garland of wonderland...

A thought ever generated should never be wasted
As you never know the wonderland which is created
is replica of yourself that is being reflected...

Life is a beautiful journey...

which is wasted by cursing

the bliss of life is realised...

only when it is about to diminish

So smile and make everybody smile because life is too short to cry....